Therapy that listens to each side of a mixed feeling
One part of you wants to say no to the extra shift. Another has already said yes and is smiling about it. A third lies awake at 2 a.m. replaying the conversation. Internal Family Systems, IFS for short, is a way of doing psychotherapy that takes those inner voices one at a time and asks what each is trying to do for you.
Carolina Vintu, PhD, is a Registered Psychotherapist in Ontario, and her clinical work incorporates IFS. Sessions are by video for clients anywhere in the province. The first step is a free 15-minute consultation.
Five words of IFS, in plain English
Richard Schwartz developed the model about four decades ago. He was a family therapist, and he applied ideas from family therapy to the patterns inside one person. The model has its own vocabulary, and it helps to know it before a first session.
Part
A side of you with its own feelings and its own job. Everyone has many of them.
For example: the side of you that rereads every email before sending it.
Manager
A part that works ahead of time to keep you out of trouble by planning, pleasing people or criticising you first.
For example: the inner critic that marks your work before anyone else can.
Firefighter
A part that steps in once a painful feeling has already arrived and tries to put it out quickly.
For example: two hours on your phone after a difficult call.
Exile
A hurt part, often a young one, that the managers and firefighters try to keep out of sight.
For example: an old feeling of being left out that turns up in the middle of a work meeting.
Self
The IFS name for you when no single part is running things. It is described as calm and curious, and able to hear every part out.
For example: being able to say "part of me is furious" and stay in the conversation.
How IFS sits beside CBT and ACT
Carolina's approach is integrative and shaped around each client's needs and goals, so IFS is one of several ways of working she may bring in. Each one looks at the same difficulty from a different side.
| Approach | What it pays attention to | A question you might hear |
|---|---|---|
| IFS | The parts of you and how they get along | "What is this part afraid would happen if it stopped?" |
| CBT | How thoughts, feelings and actions feed each other | "What went through your mind just before your mood dropped?" |
| ACT | What matters to you, and what you do when hard feelings show up | "What would you do this week if the worry came along with you?" |
She also draws on mindfulness, described on the mindfulness-informed therapy page.
What parts work is like on a video call
A good deal of IFS happens with your attention turned inward. Many people look away from the camera for a while, or close their eyes, to notice what a part feels like and where in the body it sits.
You need a private place where you can speak freely for 50 minutes.
A session often starts with whatever has been loudest that week.
The therapist asks questions, and you answer for the part or describe it.
You set the pace. A part that does not want to be approached is asked what it needs first.
The online therapy page covers the practical side of meeting by video.
What research on IFS has tested so far
IFS has been studied far less than CBT, and the trials are small. Two of them, as their authors report them:
Depressive symptoms, a 2017 pilot
- Who took part
- 37 college women, randomly allocated to two groups.
- Compared with
- Treatment as usual, which was CBT or interpersonal therapy.
- What was found
- Symptoms declined in both groups, with no significant difference in how much or how fast.
- What it leaves open
- The authors call the evidence preliminary. A pilot of this size cannot show that two treatments are equal.
Post-traumatic stress, a 2026 trial
- Who took part
- 60 adults with PTSD in an online programme based on IFS: 16 weekly groups and eight individual sessions.
- Compared with
- A nature-based stress reduction programme of the same length.
- What was found
- PTSD scores fell in both arms, with no significant difference between them. People attended more of the IFS groups.
- What it leaves open
- It tested a group programme, and its conclusion is that the programme is feasible and acceptable.
Trials like these describe groups of people. Whether this way of working suits you is something you find out in the first few sessions.
When this way of working may fit
IFS may suit you if you notice an argument inside: a harsh inner critic, a habit you return to after deciding to stop, or a reaction that feels much older than the situation in front of you.
Carolina works with persistent worry and overthinking, low mood, difficulties with self-esteem and feeling overwhelmed or disconnected. Her pages on anxiety therapy, depression therapy and trauma therapy say more about each.
Individual sessions are $180 each. The individual therapy page explains how they are set up. On the free consultation call, say that you are curious about IFS and ask whatever you need to.
Questions people ask before trying IFS
No. "Parts" is a way of talking about something most people already say: part of me wants to go and part of me wants to stay home. Having parts in this sense is ordinary.
The name comes from where the model started. The "family" is the set of parts inside one person, and your relatives do not attend. If you want to work on a relationship together with your partner, see couples therapy.
Not necessarily. Carolina's approach is integrative, so a session may also draw on CBT, ACT or mindfulness. If there is a way of working you prefer, say so on the consultation call.
Carolina provides psychotherapy in English, Russian and Romanian. The page on therapy in Russian explains how that works.
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